Untitled.

I just came in from a long lunch with one of our favourite clients.  It was lovely.  I'm a bit tired today and highly "sensitive" because well, it's the beginning of new things for me.  This blog post is untitled because I can't find a title for the whirlwind of emotions that I've gone through this week.  Up until the past Monday, all I felt was joy and exhilaration at the thought of me finally putting away my black clothes, looking forward to introducing moderate amounts of colour into my wardrobe but most importantly, hanging up my PR Intern gloves.  As I said goodbye to our client and she asked me what it is I wanted to do or was going to do - I realised that I had no idea.


The fact that I don't have a job yet does contribute to my not knowing whether I'm coming or going after this, but I've also realised that I am quite a complex soul (yes friends, family and boyfriend - I admit).  A big part of me wants to work, make money (to achieve those dreams, yes the one's I mentioned before - wink)  but a huge part of me wants to be able to work and use my God-given talents which will make work ten times less hectic and be just a way to make money doing what I love doing.  But those type of things happen in the movies don't they? I'm so unmotivated at the moment, that sitting home and doing nothing for a year seems like a great option for me.  In fact let me start over, using the word "unmotivated" is not good because I'm highly motivated just very confused.  The break I am about to take couldn't have come at a better time and boy am I grateful for it.

This way I will work towards finding exactly what I plan to do to achieve my dreams.  I might be relaxed physically but my brain has mental marathons of how I'm going to get my Mini Cooper S next year, a house two years after that, furniture in between all of that, a gorgeous closet while achieving all of that and still be happy and satisfied with what I do.  Then there are more dreams to be realised.  Having another qualification, being a member of parliament and owning my own entertainment company.  And even though I can't put time-limits or expectations - I still do.  All of the above should be achieved in the next seven years.  I know -ridiculous, not.

They (I've always wondered who 'they' are - would love to meet them) say the first step in change is realising that there is a problem, well I say the first step in achieving your dreams is having them.

My road is all mapped out now, I must just get a good pair of  takkies (any excuse to shop) and run it.